How to Set and Achieve Goals: Align Values to Goals

Kate, known as The KateOutdoors Life Coach, writing in her book in a woodland setting

Are you procrastinating? Perhaps you feel like you’re ‘falling behind’ and need motivation? This blog, I hope, will leave you with some great ideas and a 5-step strategy to set and achieve goals using values. Goals that have meaning and are personal to you, in a way that feels right for you, with the aim to stop you procrastinating further. Consider this your kick-up the bum to get back on track this year!

Why goal setting fails

I analysed some client life coaching conversations over a few years, and found these to be the main reasons for when goal-setting fails:

  • A goal doesn’t align with what truly matters to the individual: they lack of meaning or purpose, so there’s little motivation to work towards them
  • The focus was heavily on goal attainment (the end-goal/the destination), missing out on the potential ie opportunities, self-development (the journey)
  • When the external environment didn’t seem to support or allow for an individual to thrive – ie a toxic workplace, unhealthy relationships (professional and personal), challenging life transitions/situations
  • When an individual’s personal, internal environment wasn’t resourced or equipped enough (at that time,) to reach the goal ie skills, strengths, self-awareness, resilience, self-esteem, low confidence
  • When the goal was perceived as ‘difficult’ or ‘hard’, and that narrative took over – fixed mindset (read about Growth Mindset here)

When goal-setting works

We humans are naturally goal-orientated beings, always moving towards or away from goal directed behaviour (Carver and Scheier 1998). Yet we humans are also easily distracted and get stuck when it’s difficult or we don’t understand WHY. One approach my coachees and I use successfully is to understand the meaning and intrinsic motivation behind the goal, which naturally engages and supports well-being.
You may also want to read an earlier take I wrote about goal-setting and how to achieve goals, which includes useful coaching questions, here.

Self-Concordant Goals: A Goal-Setting Approach using Values

Self-Concordant Goals (Sheldon & Eliot 1998) is a powerful framework to create meaningful goals rooted in your personal values and interests. This is no SMART goal quick-fix approach (more on this later). It is powerful in understanding one’s motivation for long-term goals and desires to succeed. Importantly, it promotes a positive, emotional spiral of well-being.

Think of Self-Concordant Goals like a thriving, strong tree…

  • Your values are the trunk – the strong core, giving purpose and a sense of identity
  • Your main goals grow like branches, each reaching towards the sun, always connected to your trunk
  • Smaller goals are the twigs, extending further, detail, refining your path
  • Finally, the buds, which become then leaves are the actions and choices you make daily, each one vital and impacting the whole system of the tree
Self Concordant Goals As A Tree
Self Concordant Goals can be likened to a thriving tree as a metaphor

3 Key Points about Self-Concordant Goals:

  • Aligns with values: They reflect and align with your personal values; what’s important to you
  • Intrinsic motivation: Driven by internal desires and interests, not external expectations or pressures
  • Sense of authenticity: They resonate deep down, ‘the real me’/authentic-self

5 Steps to Set and Achieve Self-Concordant Goals with Examples

  1. Create a list of goals you want to achieve this year – don’t overthink it, put it to one side.
Example: one of my goals for 2024 was...

I want to travel more this year (we’ll build on my goal as part of the exercise )

2.   Now consider your values and in no particular order, what are they? Your values are what you hold near and dear, shaping your priorities and guiding your decisions.

Examples of values

Family, love, curiosity, personal development, helping others, fun, collaboration, community, environmental awareness (these are mine).

Coaching questions to clarify your values

  • What really matters to me in life – putting aside any expectations or obligations?
  • What do I admire most in others? What might this tell me about myself?
  • What am I unwilling to compromise on, even in difficult situations?
  • And a nature and values inspired coaching question; How do I adapt to life’s storms – do I bend like a silver birch or stand firm like an oak?

Or, use this FREE List of Values and share this post with a friend who’d benefit.

3.  Link your values to your goals to intrinsically motivate you (that is, to engage, interest and encourage you, yourself). This might be challenging! Note: we’re not looking for external pressure or obligations on you here – that’s extrinsic motivation – the kick-up-the-bum Drill Instructor approach is for another time!

Back to my travel goal example, this time using my values …;

I want to travel more this year, explore new places, because I love learning and experiencing different cultures and people through their food, language and environment. It makes me feel happy! I appreciate what I have and what’s around me.

4.   Create action steps to set personal goals
Identify potential actions or steps towards your goal. Using the *SMART goal acronym (see below) could be useful here.

My travel goal example is now broken into action steps behind the goal:

Step 1.   I’m going to learn some basic Portuguese using Duolingo over the next 3 months
Step 2.   I will contact my friends who live abroad and plan to meet up with at least 2 of them….Etc

*SMART Goals – an acronym for:

  • Specific
  • Measurable
  • Achievable
  • Realistic
  • Timebound

5.   Write down your goal, values and different steps, or map it out in colour on a big sheet of paper. People who write down their goals are 42% more likely to achieve them, according to research at the Dominican University in California, by Dr Gail Matthews.

People Who Write Down Their Goals Are 42% More Likely To Achieve Them

4 Practical Tips for Staying on Track with your Goals

  • Review and celebrate progress and small wins regularly
  • Be flexible – it’s OK to adjust goals and steps
  • Get an accountability partner to check in with
  • Keep your goals visible and write it down – on paper on the fridge, by your desk…

How did I do with my goal to travel last year? I nailed it! And loved it! I didn’t learn Portuguese or go to Portugal, but instead I went to Catalunya, learned some basic Catalan and successfully played bingo at a fiesta, drinking lots of wine with locals!

So if you’ve been procrastinating, and want to be motivated and enthused, are you encouraged to set self-concordant goals today?

 

Book a free call with me to see how I can get you motivated and achieve your goals – in a way that’s right for you!

Client agreement - ground rules.

1. Bring my whole self to this process; professionally and personally.

You cannot separate your professional and personal ‘lives’.

2. Be present in the moment and connected.

… to the coaching; what you’re thinking, feeling, experiencing. And…to nature if and where we are outdoors. If we’re on headphones, I’ll invite you to be descriptive of your environment too.

3. Bring the agenda to each session and keep your overall objective alive.

You can do this in several ways:

  • Be goal and action orientated – bring what you want to discuss and achieve to the session; OR
  • Talk and see what lands – exploratory and intentional.
 

I will bring the process, tools, ideas, resources and best practice to best support you towards your goal/intention/objective. More in your pre-coaching questionnaire. 

4. Give feedback and be responsive.

Coaching is collaborative. Neither of us should guess where we stand. I ask you to give me feedback and respond – you can rely on me to give and do the same.

I aim to get back to you within 24 hours of you emailing me, even if it’s just to say ‘I received your message’ before I respond properly. If it’s over the weekend or holiday, this may take longer.

5. Do the work in the session and in between sessions.

…so that you get the best value, even when it’s challenging. I might suggest a piece of work based on what you brought to the session. Mainly you will decide your course of action.

Whichever way, I’ll invite you to:

  • Reflect more; through walking, writing and whatever else fires you up, to help you achieve your objective.
  • Explore more; be curious and follow those trails of thought, intentionally
    Practice more; habits? Actions? Keep trying/tweaking.
  • Note what’s coming up that’s important or interesting to you in the session. I may share a few bullet points with you after, via Google Docs.

6. Session duration and timescale.

Generally a session is an hour but happy to shorten or increase session lengths, as and when we both can, that day. Where either of us thinks it appropriate, let’s say in the session. Timescale – let’s keep to the timescale agreed in the contract.

Additional information...

  • Coaching is a relationship designed to facilitate the development of personal or professional goals and develop a plan/strategy for achieving those goals.
  • It is comprehensive; it may involve other areas of your life beyond what you may have originally intended. It is your responsibility to choose and decide how to handle this, or even whether to.
  • It can be challenging; digging deep, creating better habits, becoming more self-aware, changing unhelpful beliefs you hold about yourself to something more helpful. There will be ups and downs. You will gain new insights, learnings and perspectives to help you achieve your goal.
  • You – the Client, are solely responsible for creating and implementing your own physical, mental and emotional well-being, decisions, choices, actions and results arising out of or resulting from the coaching relationship and your coaching calls and interactions with me – the Coach. As such, you agree that the Coach is not and will not be liable or responsible for any actions or inaction, or for any direct or indirect result of any services provided by me – the Coach. 
  • You – the Client, understand that in order to enhance the coaching relationship, you agree to communicate honestly, be open to feedback and assistance and to create the time and energy to participate fully in the program. I will do the same.
  • Coaching is not a substitute for counselling, mental health care or substance abuse treatment.  If you are in any kind of therapy, please tell me.  Tell your practitioner (medical or therapeutic) of you working with me.
  • I ask you to agree to commit to the coaching sessions to facilitate the required change.
  • I will treat you as the expert regarding the subject matter, which is…YOU.
  • I will allow time and space for you to explore your thoughts and think for yourself, no interruptions. There may be long pauses or silence sometimes to elicit more.
  • What goes on in your sessions is confidential. I do not discuss it with anyone. There may be occasion when it is my duty to break confidentiality:
    > If I feel you or I are at risk of harm.
    > Criminal / illegal activity.
    > A safeguarding concern or something else so serious that warrants concern.
  • I may talk to my coach or supervisor about issues arising in our sessions without ever naming or giving away you as the client. This is to ensure I am following professional and ethical guidelines and delivering my best. I subscribe to these by the ICF; https://coachfederation.org/code-of-ethics
  • Qualifications and CPD; I am an accredited coach. This means I have trained, practiced and qualified with Animas Centre for Coaching (Nov 2020). I hold a ‘Diploma in Transformational Coaching’. This is accredited by the International Coaching Federation (ICF).
    > I have my own coach and group supervision
    > My CPD includes –  Outdoor Intelligence for Online Coaching (Oct 2020) -Positive Psychology (Feb 2021
Water Element 1.svg

My accreditations

Birds

My story

I’d been trying to work out ‘what else’ I could do with my career and life.

After 20 years in HR and with the children getting older, I wanted to change careers, but into ‘what?’ And ‘how’ was that even possible? And…’who would take on a mid-40’s apprentice?’!

I took small steps to boost my confidence and mindset; a regular ‘walk and whinge’ with friends to offload, short courses to up-skill, more running, more netball.
I asked my workplace ‘what else’ they needed that I could help with – ‘job crafting’. 

I was trying to make changes but it wasn’t really working. I was still frustrated and now, more miserable. I needed a different approach to find a way forward and release the building pressure I felt.

Hiring an accredited coach with whom I knew I could work with, enabled me to take a good look at myself – at times, uncomfortably.

To be listened to without any interruption, or judgement was empowering and I started to recognise what made me, me – my personality, strengths, what energised me and made me happy. What if these things amounted to a job I would…love…?

I followed my curiosity and dabbled with ideas about potential jobs, tasks and environments that would suit me, with a new, growth mindset.

I started to shift perspective. When I finally realised the ‘what’, I felt an energy and sense of knowing that was powerful. And I laughed, because it had been right in front of me!

Coaching undoubtedly helped me get to know myself, to see my potential and what was possible. I wholeheartedly decided through those sessions, on what and how I wanted things to be.

It had taken me two years of feeling stuck and miserable and a number of hours to be liberated.

This is what I now do with my clients. I help them rediscover themselves so that they can play to their strengths and thrive.

Water