{"id":8920,"date":"2023-05-12T11:07:46","date_gmt":"2023-05-12T10:07:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/?p=8920"},"modified":"2023-10-29T16:27:12","modified_gmt":"2023-10-29T16:27:12","slug":"at-a-crossroads-in-life-5-powerful-tips-to-chose-your-path","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/at-a-crossroads-in-life-5-powerful-tips-to-chose-your-path\/","title":{"rendered":"At a crossroads in life? 5 powerful tips to chose your path"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>4 minute read with resources<\/em><\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s not uncommon to find yourself at a crossroads in life. And if you&#8217;re in midlife, the &#8216;midlife crisis&#8217; can seem very real; feeling stuck, unfulfilled, or unsure which path to take.<br \/>\nMaybe you&#8217;re considering a career change or life change or thinking, &#8216;<em>is this how I want the rest of my life to be..?&#8217;<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>The great news is that there are plenty of options available to help you.<\/p>\n<p>Here are some life coaching tips that I notice are useful in my work, to help make sense of this pivotal time of change.<\/p>\n<h2>1.\u00a0 \u00a0 Take time to pause (rest)<\/h2>\n<p>When we take time to pause, we rest and digest &#8211; essential for the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.simplypsychology.org\/parasympathetic-nervous-system.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">parasympathetic nervous system<\/a> to perform its basic functions.<\/p>\n<p>Rest..;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Alleviates or reduces stress<\/li>\n<li>Promotes wellbeing and productivity<\/li>\n<li>Increases energy over time<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>We know that if we&#8217;re not well rested, we don&#8217;t operate well; moody, tired, make mistakes, feel on edge &#8211; the list goes on.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/thewellbeingthesis.org.uk\/foundations-for-success\/importance-of-taking-breaks-and-having-other-interests\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">This article<\/a> talks about the importance of taking breaks for wellbeing.<\/p>\n<p>Taking a pause &#8211; a break &#8211;\u00a0 may be challenging if you&#8217;re feeling overwhelmed or feeling stressed. Here are some practical options about what it could look like for you;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Time off work &#8211; a holiday, sabbatical, time in lieu etc<\/li>\n<li>A day by yourself to get away. IE the seaside, a long walk in the country<\/li>\n<li>Micro doses of rest &#8211; build and boundary small breaks into your day. Ie work 25 mins, rest 5 mins &#8211; Pomodoro Technique https:\/\/todoist.com\/productivity-methods\/pomodoro-technique<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h3>Benefits of taking a break<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li>Breathing space away from the situation<\/li>\n<li>A break in your routine, which may not be serving you<\/li>\n<li>Time for you<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>By resting we put ourselves in a stronger position to make better decisions and be a nicer person inside and out.<\/p>\n<p>I run a group Walk and Talk for Midlife Women in Beckenham Place Park. Check out my Pause Outdoors collab here.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/pauseoutdoors.co.uk\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-8941\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/take_a_pause_outdoors_button.png\" alt=\"Take a Pause Outdoors\" width=\"299\" height=\"57\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/take_a_pause_outdoors_button.png 620w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/take_a_pause_outdoors_button-300x57.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 299px) 100vw, 299px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-8925\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sometimes-a-break-from-your-routine-is-the-very-thing-you-need.png\" alt=\"View over green hills in the UK countryside with blue sky\" width=\"940\" height=\"788\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sometimes-a-break-from-your-routine-is-the-very-thing-you-need.png 940w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sometimes-a-break-from-your-routine-is-the-very-thing-you-need-300x251.png 300w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sometimes-a-break-from-your-routine-is-the-very-thing-you-need-768x644.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 940px) 100vw, 940px\" \/><\/p>\n<h2>2.\u00a0 \u00a0 Work out what matters &#8211; values<\/h2>\n<p>Having paused, you\u2019ve started to reset. Now to work out what really matters to you. These are your VALUES &#8211; your guiding principles on how you live your life and are unique to you.<\/p>\n<p>Getting clear on your values enables you to notice;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Where you are living your life in line with your values<\/li>\n<li>The choices you make &#8211; if they\u2019re good\/right<\/li>\n<li>What\u2019s making you unhappy\/ dissatisfied and understand more importantly, why<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>If your values &#8211; what\u2019s important to you, are not present, you might feel discombobulated (my favourite word!). By doing this work, you might find clues that indicate why you feel like you\u2019re at this crossroads in midlife.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h3>Being aware of your values can give you;<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li>Clarity &#8211; work out what you really want and;<\/li>\n<li>Confidence in your decision making<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Email me if you&#8217;d like an exercise on identifying your values, <a href=\"mailto:kate@thekateoutdoors.uk\">here<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h2>3.\u00a0 \u00a0 Have fun &#8211; imagine what your life could be like!<\/h2>\n<p>You\u2019re at this crossroads in midlife, you\u2019re clear on what\u2019s important to you and you choose your best path&#8230;;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #ff9c98;\"> What does your life look like now? (!)<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Visualisation can be <strong>powerful<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>You might have a really clear picture of where your future lies, or a sense of how you want to feel, or a lifestyle you\u2019ve dreamed of but never articulated\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Studies have shown that people who visualise themselves <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC4879139\/#B33\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">flexing a muscle achieve actual physical strength gains<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Find out more by listening to Dr. Michael Mosely on his excellent <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bbc.co.uk\/programmes\/m0010pn6\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">podcast.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I have a beautiful visualisation exercise in my coaching toolkit; you imagine your future self and through certain steps and questions, we bring it alive!<\/p>\n<p>I remember this exercise working with my client, Sharon. She said that she\u2019d like to live on a canal boat. I invited her to really go into detail and describe the boat, the surroundings, who was with her &#8211; so her image became almost real.<\/p>\n<p>Sharon says she, \u2018<em>&#8230;initially found it a bit odd!\u2019<\/em> (!) \ud83d\ude02<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\u2018I think it made the boat idea more real, somehow more tangible. Like a step closer! So many ideas whirling around but that experience helped to cement the boat plan..\u2019<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Now she lives on her canal boat.<\/p>\n<p>Dreams can come true.<\/p>\n<p><em>(Thank you Sharon for your permission to share here).<\/em><\/p>\n<pre><span style=\"color: #ff9c98;\">Whatever it is, can you visualise what and how your amazing life could be like?\r\n<\/span><\/pre>\n<figure id=\"attachment_8926\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-8926\" style=\"width: 639px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-8926 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sharon-and-Roma.webp\" alt=\"Women reversing her canal boat with Mallard flying overhead\" width=\"639\" height=\"756\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sharon-and-Roma.webp 639w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Sharon-and-Roma-254x300.webp 254w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 639px) 100vw, 639px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-8926\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><span style=\"color: #ffffff;\">Sharon on her canal boat, Roma<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<h3>Benefits of visualisation;<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li>Creative &#8211; brings that dream alive<\/li>\n<li>Playful &#8211; brings out your inner child!<\/li>\n<li>Fun &#8211; gets you excited about your future<\/li>\n<li>Your brain effectively believes it\u2019s real!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>There are many different mediums to imagine and visualise; storytelling, a mood board, writing, painting.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/calendly.com\/thekateoutdoors\/30min\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-8936\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/book_a_free_call_button.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"280\" height=\"70\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/book_a_free_call_button.png 488w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/book_a_free_call_button-300x75.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 280px) 100vw, 280px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h2>4.\u00a0 \u00a0 Make it your goal<\/h2>\n<p>Your goal could be, <em>\u201c I want out of my job and into something more fulfilling&#8221;<\/em>, or, <em>\u2018I want to make a decision about what next in life\u2019.<\/em><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Work out <strong>&#8216;what&#8217;<\/strong> is your end goal &#8211; what do you want to achieve specifically?<\/li>\n<li>Break it down into small, manageable steps &#8211; the<strong> &#8216;how&#8217;<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Write it down &#8211; people who write down their goals are more likely to succeed in achieving them<\/li>\n<li>Keep reviewing and checking your progress<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>This means you&#8217;ll take measurable steps towards what you want to achieve and you&#8217;ll be proactive.<\/p>\n<p>Make your goal SMART;<\/p>\n<p><strong>S<\/strong>pecific<br \/>\n<strong>M<\/strong>easurable<br \/>\n<strong>A<\/strong>chievable<br \/>\n<strong>R<\/strong>ealistic<br \/>\n<strong>T<\/strong>ime-bound<\/p>\n<h3>Benefits of having a goal;<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li>Direction &#8211; to work towards<\/li>\n<li>Focus &#8211; eyes on the prize!<\/li>\n<li>Clarity &#8211; you know what you\u2019re doing<\/li>\n<li>Purpose &#8211; your reason &#8211; your WHY<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<figure id=\"attachment_8927\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-8927\" style=\"width: 800px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-8927 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/bill-murray-quote-1024x1024.png\" alt=\"Woman in icy lake taking a cold water dip. Wearing gloves and bobble hat\" width=\"800\" height=\"800\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/bill-murray-quote-1024x1024.png 1024w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/bill-murray-quote-300x300.png 300w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/bill-murray-quote-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/bill-murray-quote-768x768.png 768w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/bill-murray-quote.png 1080w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-8927\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><span style=\"color: #ffffff;\">Me at Beckenham Place Park lake in the ice. It was the COLDEST water I&#8217;ve ever been in.<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<h2>5.\u00a0 \u00a0Get support from someone who can help you<\/h2>\n<p>Reaching out to say, <em>\u201cI\u2019m at a crossroads &#8211; help!\u201d<\/em>, puts it out there and take some pressure off you. Having someone who\u2019ll actively listen to you, or advise or inspire you, are all great qualities at this time of need.<\/p>\n<p>I firmly believe as a Life Coach that everyone has the resourcefulness in them to change &#8211; they just need help teasing it out, feel safe to to do so and have the motivation to explore it.<\/p>\n<p>Working out \u2018which way\u2019 at your midlife crossroads takes time and reflection. It&#8217;s challenge, it requires your best thinking, ideas, clarity, a plan.<\/p>\n<p>Yet the effort &#8211; the payoff &#8211; could FAR outweigh what you&#8217;re currently experiencing. People like Sharon (and me!) come out the other side thriving, realising <em>it was always<\/em> within our reach.<\/p>\n<p>If you need a hand, this is what I do in my work; I help midlife people unlock their potential &#8211; life coaching outdoors.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/calendly.com\/thekateoutdoors\/30min\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8936\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/book_a_free_call_button.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"216\" height=\"54\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/book_a_free_call_button.png 488w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/book_a_free_call_button-300x75.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 216px) 100vw, 216px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Join my monthly Pause Outdoors &#8211; a Group Walk and Talk for Midlife Women.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/pauseoutdoors.co.uk\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-8941\" src=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/take_a_pause_outdoors_button.png\" alt=\"Take a Pause Outdoors\" width=\"246\" height=\"47\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/take_a_pause_outdoors_button.png 620w, https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/take_a_pause_outdoors_button-300x57.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 246px) 100vw, 246px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s not uncommon to find yourself at a crossroads in life. And if you&#8217;re in midlife, the &#8216;midlife crisis&#8217; can seem very real; feeling unfulfilled, stuck, or unsure which path to take.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":8929,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[31,15,23,39],"tags":[41,16,21,40,17,28,42,20,36,29],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8920"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8920"}],"version-history":[{"count":25,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8920\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9222,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8920\/revisions\/9222"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8929"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8920"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8920"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekateoutdoors.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8920"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}