Is Life Coaching Right for Me?

Midlife woman walking outdoors with a life coach, talking and reflecting in nature

You might be wondering if life coaching is right for you – or for somebody you know. Maybe you’re at a crossroads in midlife, juggling work and caring responsibilities, have financial pressures or you’re feeling stuck. Coaching can help you reconnect with what matters and take small steps forwards, but how do you know if it’s right for you?

Over five years of coaching outdoors, I’ve seen again and again how small steps can lead to big changes – especially when life feels messy or complicated. Acknowledging that help is needed might be the first step, but those additional steps – getting started, building on the small wins, working with someone not involved in your life – can be transformational.

Here are a few signs that life coaching could be useful, and how to know whether you’re ready.

How to Know if Life Coaching is Right for You

  • You want something to shift
    Even if you’re not sure what exactly, there’s often a spark of change, a sense that something’s out of kilter and you’d like to explore it.

  • You’re open to reflection
    Coaching isn’t about advice or quick fixes and you won’t get that from me. Coaching is about asking the right questions and holding space to think differently. You’re willing to dig a bit deeper, get another angle on what’s preventing you from doing whatever ‘it’ is yourself, or achieving that goal that you’re not currently successful with – yet.

  • You’re ready to take small steps
    Coaching can bring challenges and discomfort, but you’re willing to be honest, to experiment, and to take ownership. You will move out of your comfort zone with this mindset, and we will definitely celebrate your small wins and achievements.

  • Life is complicated — and that’s OK
    Ageing parents, raising kids, the cost of living, job uncertainty — these are the realities of many I work with, they’re not reasons to delay working with a Life Coach. So let’s be realistic; we work with them, not against them.

  • You don’t need to have a goal worked out
    Many people I work with arrive with a sense of disconnect and are in need of a shift; they don’t necessarily come with a clear goal – and that’s OK. Part of the work can be clarifying the goal and sense of direction.

And if you’re wondering whether counselling, therapy or something else might be a better approach, ask the Coach. I’ll share if I think my coaching isn’t the best fit for your needs. I talk about this in my previous post, How to cope with Overwhelm in Midlife.

A calm lake surrounded by trees and greenery
I choose to coach outdoors – wellbeing, getting outside, walking and talking together helps move my clients forwards

What to Look for in a Life Coach

When searching for a Life Coach, it’s a pretty personal and subjective choice, and there are lots out there. Having worked with a few coaches and had hundreds of free discovery calls, this is what I look for:

  1. Strong interpersonal (soft) skills; actively listens, has empathy, ‘gets me’ but doesn’t pander. Is adaptable in terms of approach, is encouraging, insightful, calm, level-headed.
  2. Relevant experience, formal training via a reputable coaching organisation, like the ICF or the EMCC.  Ie you want a career change and to feel more confident in yourself, so the Coach should have experience doing this successfully with others. And, continual professional training (CPD), which is often on their LinkedIn profile – or just ask them.
  3. An added dimension that adds value – and this is hard to quantify! It’s a ‘something special’ element, an added bonus, or an ethos that inspires you. It’s like the seasoning and flavour in a recipe! For example, my Coach is a practising Buddhist and Mindfulness teacher – I didn’t set out looking for this, but I was kind of curious by it. Her practice and undeniable influence on my work has been hugely beneficial in ways I’d never imagined.

Ultimately, look for a Life Coach who gets you, gets your needs and whom you believe can get you to your goal. Your gut-feeling matters, trust your instincts. It’s also important to say that there are no guarantees you will get to your goal at the end of the coaching. But something will have shifted.

Coaching Questions to Help You Decide if Life Coaching is Right for You

  • What in my life do I need to explore or make sense of right now? 

  • Do I have a sense that something needs to shift, even if I’m not quite sure to ‘what’?

  • Am I looking for a quick fix or lasting change? And if it’s lasting change, am I willing to put the work in?

  • Can I commit some time and energy to coaching, even if life feels full or uncertain?

  • Am I willing to be challenged – kindly and constructively – if it helps me move to where I want to be?

  • Do I want to feel more confident, clear, or in control of the decisions I make?

  • Have I lost touch with a sense of purpose in life?

  • If I let go of fear or doubt for a moment, what would I choose for myself right now?

A Note on Life Coaching Costs

Don’t assume that coaching can only be good if it’s expensive – that’s just marketing and branding. My belief is that coaching should be more widely available and accessible to more people, and that means breaking down barriers to coaching. Having worked with individuals at a reduced rate for a few years now informally, I’m about to introduce a sliding scale of pricing to make life coaching more affordable, more accessible. Please don’t rule it out on cost alone.

Final Thought

If this post resonates with you, or makes you think of someone you know who might benefit from life coaching, please do share it. And if you’re curious to learn more, my next blog post is all about what to expect from a life coaching ‘intro call’. Join my mailing list (below in the corner) to be the first to know!

Client agreement - ground rules.

1. Bring my whole self to this process; professionally and personally.

You cannot separate your professional and personal ‘lives’.

2. Be present in the moment and connected.

… to the coaching; what you’re thinking, feeling, experiencing. And…to nature if and where we are outdoors. If we’re on headphones, I’ll invite you to be descriptive of your environment too.

3. Bring the agenda to each session and keep your overall objective alive.

You can do this in several ways:

  • Be goal and action orientated – bring what you want to discuss and achieve to the session; OR
  • Talk and see what lands – exploratory and intentional.
 

I will bring the process, tools, ideas, resources and best practice to best support you towards your goal/intention/objective. More in your pre-coaching questionnaire. 

4. Give feedback and be responsive.

Coaching is collaborative. Neither of us should guess where we stand. I ask you to give me feedback and respond – you can rely on me to give and do the same.

I aim to get back to you within 24 hours of you emailing me, even if it’s just to say ‘I received your message’ before I respond properly. If it’s over the weekend or holiday, this may take longer.

5. Do the work in the session and in between sessions.

…so that you get the best value, even when it’s challenging. I might suggest a piece of work based on what you brought to the session. Mainly you will decide your course of action.

Whichever way, I’ll invite you to:

  • Reflect more; through walking, writing and whatever else fires you up, to help you achieve your objective.
  • Explore more; be curious and follow those trails of thought, intentionally
    Practice more; habits? Actions? Keep trying/tweaking.
  • Note what’s coming up that’s important or interesting to you in the session. I may share a few bullet points with you after, via Google Docs.

6. Session duration and timescale.

Generally a session is an hour but happy to shorten or increase session lengths, as and when we both can, that day. Where either of us thinks it appropriate, let’s say in the session. Timescale – let’s keep to the timescale agreed in the contract.

Additional information...

  • Coaching is a relationship designed to facilitate the development of personal or professional goals and develop a plan/strategy for achieving those goals.
  • It is comprehensive; it may involve other areas of your life beyond what you may have originally intended. It is your responsibility to choose and decide how to handle this, or even whether to.
  • It can be challenging; digging deep, creating better habits, becoming more self-aware, changing unhelpful beliefs you hold about yourself to something more helpful. There will be ups and downs. You will gain new insights, learnings and perspectives to help you achieve your goal.
  • You – the Client, are solely responsible for creating and implementing your own physical, mental and emotional well-being, decisions, choices, actions and results arising out of or resulting from the coaching relationship and your coaching calls and interactions with me – the Coach. As such, you agree that the Coach is not and will not be liable or responsible for any actions or inaction, or for any direct or indirect result of any services provided by me – the Coach. 
  • You – the Client, understand that in order to enhance the coaching relationship, you agree to communicate honestly, be open to feedback and assistance and to create the time and energy to participate fully in the program. I will do the same.
  • Coaching is not a substitute for counselling, mental health care or substance abuse treatment.  If you are in any kind of therapy, please tell me.  Tell your practitioner (medical or therapeutic) of you working with me.
  • I ask you to agree to commit to the coaching sessions to facilitate the required change.
  • I will treat you as the expert regarding the subject matter, which is…YOU.
  • I will allow time and space for you to explore your thoughts and think for yourself, no interruptions. There may be long pauses or silence sometimes to elicit more.
  • What goes on in your sessions is confidential. I do not discuss it with anyone. There may be occasion when it is my duty to break confidentiality:
    > If I feel you or I are at risk of harm.
    > Criminal / illegal activity.
    > A safeguarding concern or something else so serious that warrants concern.
  • I may talk to my coach or supervisor about issues arising in our sessions without ever naming or giving away you as the client. This is to ensure I am following professional and ethical guidelines and delivering my best. I subscribe to these by the ICF; https://coachfederation.org/code-of-ethics
  • Qualifications and CPD; I am an accredited coach. This means I have trained, practiced and qualified with Animas Centre for Coaching (Nov 2020). I hold a ‘Diploma in Transformational Coaching’. This is accredited by the International Coaching Federation (ICF).
    > I have my own coach and group supervision
    > My CPD includes –  Outdoor Intelligence for Online Coaching (Oct 2020) -Positive Psychology (Feb 2021
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My accreditations

Birds

My story

I’d been trying to work out ‘what else’ I could do with my career and life.

After 20 years in HR and with the children getting older, I wanted to change careers, but into ‘what?’ And ‘how’ was that even possible? And…’who would take on a mid-40’s apprentice?’!

I took small steps to boost my confidence and mindset; a regular ‘walk and whinge’ with friends to offload, short courses to up-skill, more running, more netball.
I asked my workplace ‘what else’ they needed that I could help with – ‘job crafting’. 

I was trying to make changes but it wasn’t really working. I was still frustrated and now, more miserable. I needed a different approach to find a way forward and release the building pressure I felt.

Hiring an accredited coach with whom I knew I could work with, enabled me to take a good look at myself – at times, uncomfortably.

To be listened to without any interruption, or judgement was empowering and I started to recognise what made me, me – my personality, strengths, what energised me and made me happy. What if these things amounted to a job I would…love…?

I followed my curiosity and dabbled with ideas about potential jobs, tasks and environments that would suit me, with a new, growth mindset.

I started to shift perspective. When I finally realised the ‘what’, I felt an energy and sense of knowing that was powerful. And I laughed, because it had been right in front of me!

Coaching undoubtedly helped me get to know myself, to see my potential and what was possible. I wholeheartedly decided through those sessions, on what and how I wanted things to be.

It had taken me two years of feeling stuck and miserable and a number of hours to be liberated.

This is what I now do with my clients. I help them rediscover themselves so that they can play to their strengths and thrive.

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